An Excerpt From an Online Blog

There are things that I need to tell you and have been thinking it through very much. Have been having all of these thoughts for some time but didn’t know how to exactly say it to you. Hasn’t been easy as I truly feel that there is a barrier that makes it extremely awkward to vocalize my thoughts let alone have a casual conversation.

By writing here for you to read, you have a choice on what you would like to do; to go on reading or alternatively just not read further or even delete this. It is basically your choice as in many other things.

You said that so many people have been inconsiderate or unappreciative of the things you have done for them. At the same time, I personally feel that that’s how it’s been for me

It pisses me off so bad that you just decided that we are to stay as friends.... It sucks when it feels like being placed in a suspense account to be written off like a bad debt.

I aint saying that changes don’t happen but being kept in the dark really doesn’t help. Maybe in the benefit of the doubt, you don’t really know yourself.

One thing is for sure, I don’t know what I should be doing for there is a large part of me that still cares for you though it is killing me to do so.

Another part of me is trying so hard to fleet cause I feel the rest of my life is not getting any easier and with this all, it is even more complicated.

Life can fuck up in many ways and many times when it comes to things like this, sometimes, the best thing to do is to walk away.

In my case, I really don’t know what to do and I am not in the state of mind to make such decisions under the circumstances I am in neither do I want you to make the decision of how things are to be. Except for the fact I know now, probably the solution is to find a way to get out of the country the soonest possible and make life easier for you and me.